#6-Love: An incomplete guide 

(Part 1)

Only read if you don’t mind being offended.

Referring to romantic love, though I believe there is much overlap on the topic.

I have not found much in the way of solid advice on how to find the right person to be with. And after many, many mistakes, I am starting to become of the mind that most successful don't know why they are successful and have little experience, and those with much experience are likely to never commit to a point to make it work, despite having more understanding. It's a bit grim, but I guess it is what it is.

Firstly, I think few are ready to share their life with others. Improving yourself is a never ending process and you are tested in far more ways than you'd ever imagine being in a romantic relationship. At the end of the day you can only change yourself. Be prepared to do that... a lot.

Secondly, try to have enough attention from the opposite sex that you know what it looks like and you don't fall for someone just because they are the first person to bat their eyes at you. This may not be an issue for most, but I think it is for some. It's good to feel like you have options and thus you feel more confident about holding high standards. But don't be cocky about it and use that to feel that others are disposable. It can be a thin line between confident and knowing you are attractive to some and being completely self-absorbed.

What makes a couple click?

I think many things work and don't work. I have experienced first-hand what it's like to be with someone who you admire and who is good to everyone except yourself. I've also experienced a great deal of compatibility and situational convenience without being on the same wavelength. And lastly, I've begun to understand what it's like to be exceptionally compatible with someone but in a very difficult situation outside of our relationship, all around.

There are many things to consider. One is the practical side. What would a relationship with this person look like? In your words, and in theirs? Where are your differences in those ideas? Are they 30 miles away? How flexible are they in life? Are they 3,000 miles away?

In another aspect, are they independent? Can they tell your parents about you? Are they in control of their life? How many things do they have on their must-do list that don't or and probably won't involve you?

Are they philosophically and ideologically compatible? This might mean neither of you care much about such things. It might also mean that you are very opinionated and open minded. Or it might mean that you are both fairly closed-minded but have very similar views.

Do your goals in life align? Can they align? Will your goals draw you further apart or closer together?

 To be continued......